Down in the dumps

if u have been reading my blog, u would realize that in my last post, i talk about losing weight to look good for December blah blah blah.

yeah..i went to see an instructor for Herbalife and tried their shakes and it taste good.after listening to the coach i realize that hey..maybe i should try. the coach gave me a full body scan and i got the shock f my life. my inner fat level is very high.i have so much fat in my organs that anytime i could get cancer or heart attack. so..now its not about losing weight anymore. its for my health..its for my life. i dont want to get sick when i reached 30. i dont want to get cancer when i turn 35. i dont want to suffer menapouse early because i have so much inner fat. i want to take care of myself. u see...i am not at all embaress to share this information to the world because i know all this while i've been living in denial. i dont believe that i am THAT overweight.hey..people can be skinny but still they get heart problems and diebetes..its our body. if our body is not healthy..it does'nt matter if you are skinny or fat, u will still get sick.

i have a problem convincing my mom to use her credit card first and i will pay her everymonth..she believes that there will be interest etc. hm..i dont know. i dont know what to think..what to say..i dont know.

im scared of whats happening to my body..ive been feeling down since yesterday because yeah..i admit it. I AM SICK. i have to do something NOW. but i need a little help... Ya Allah..show me the way.its not about losing weight now.its now about being HEALTHY.. please...